Friday, 29 July 2016 12:34

How to Actively Listen

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YOU ARE NOT LISTENING TO ME WHEN...

You do not care about me;
You say you understand before you know me well enough;
You have an answer for my problem before I've finished telling you what my problem is;
You cut me off before I have finished speaking;
You find me boring and don't tell me;
You feel critical of my vocabulary, grammar or accent;
You are dying to tell me something;
You tell me about your experience making mine seem unimportant;
You are communicating with someone else in the room;
You refuse my thanks by saying you haven't really done anything.

YOU ARE LISTENING TO ME WHEN...

You come quietly into my private world and let me be me;
 You really try to understand me even if I’m not making much sense
 You grasp my point of view even if it goes against your own sincere convictions;
 You realize the hour I took from you has left you a bit tired and drained;
 You allow me the dignity of making my own decisions even though you think they may be wrong;
 You do not take my problem from me, but allow me to deal with it in my own way;
 You hold back your desire to give me good advice
 You do not offer me religious solace when you sense I am not ready for it;
 You give me enough room to discover for myself what is going on;
 You accept my gift of gratitude by telling me how good it makes you feel to know you have been helpful

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Warning Signs

Warning signs may include but are not limited to:
Withdrawing from family and friends
Having difficulty concentrating and thinking clearly
Sleeping too much or too little
Feeling tired most of the time
Gaining or losing a significant amount of weight
Talking about feeling hopeless or guilty
Talking about suicide or death
Self-destructive behaviour like drinking too much or abusing drugs
Losing interest in favourite things or activities
Giving away prized possessions
Mood swings
IMPORTANT
If a friend mentions suicide, take it seriously. If they have expressed an immediate plan, or have access to prescription medication or other potentially deadly means, do not leave them alone. Get help immediately.

Helplines

The Samaritans116 123
Pieta House1800 247 247
Aware1890 30 33 02
ISPCC Childline1800 66 66 66
Teen-Line Ireland1800 83 36 34

Contact Us

Youth Suicide Prevention Ireland (RCN20070670)
Atrium Business Centre
Blackpool Retail Park, Blackpool
Cork City, Ireland
Tel 021 - 242 7173
Email admin@yspi.eu